This week, we have another from our “Best of the Vlog” Series. In it, I talk about food addiction amnesia, because tomorrow is Thanksgiving in the U.S., and millions of people are going to pick up food that they have an addictive relationship with, thinking it will be okay because it’s a holiday.

When “Life Falls Apart”: Amnesia about the Consequences of Addiction

Someone wrote to us recently with a question: “How do I stop the amnesia that sets in when I’m off sugar and flour and go back to thinking I can eat it ‘just once?’ Then my life falls apart all over again.”

My dear, you have stumbled on what is perhaps the defining feature of addiction.

Nearly 100 years ago, a group of men looked at this same phenomenon and condensed their thoughts into The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. They noted in the book that alcoholics lose their power of choice and willpower becomes nonexistent. An alcoholic can’t call to mind, with sufficient force, the memory of how terribly they suffered while drinking. They called this the “strange mental blank spot.”

Someone who doesn’t eat addictively can have a huge meal, and the only consequences might be a bad night’s sleep and a too-full stomach. But for us, as you note, our lives fall apart. It may lead to bingeing until we feel like our stomachs are going to explode. The consequences can last for days, just like a wicked hangover.

What’s missing in our minds is effective thought about the consequences. If you have a strawberry allergy, for example, and your throat closes up and you can’t breathe when you eat one, you won’t eat strawberries again. You understand the consequences. But with addiction, there’s an amnesia about the consequences.

There’s Science Behind the Addiction Amnesia Phenomenon

There are three scientific concepts behind this pattern. The first is prefrontal cortex dysregulation: addiction weakens the brain’s ability to make rational decisions, suppress impulses, and access relevant memories. The second is state-dependent memory and learning, meaning people recall different memories depending on their emotional or physical state. When someone is abstaining and feeling stable, it’s hard to recall the misery of binges; when they’re overeating, it’s hard to remember feeling healthy and in control. The third is procedural memory, or “muscle memory,” where automatic behaviors—like riding a bike or picking up food at a buffet—can happen just because you’ve done it before and your body remembers how to do it.

So what do you do about it? The men of AA concluded: we’re screwed. We are totally doomed, and therefore, our defense needs to come from God. They encapsulated this thinking in the 12 Steps. And they do work. In Bright Line Eating, this translates as committing to work a heck of a program.

We’re not supposed to diagnose people, but based on what this person wrote, my professional opinion is that they have a full-blown food addiction, based on their sentence about their world falling apart. The clinically significant impairment and distress they’re describing is a hallmark of addiction.

Bright Line Eating Is a Solution That Works for Food Addiction

If you have a full-blown food addiction, working the Bright Line Eating program from the book isn’t going to cut it. The way to recover is to join the Boot Camp. Become a Bright Lifer. That gives you, first of all, a tremendous community of support that will help you build an identity as someone who doesn’t eat flour and sugar. Not just a diet mentality, and not just because you’re trying to lose weight.

You need to do it because you are a food addict, and Bright Line Eating is your salvation, your life, your way out of hell. That’s what it takes. It needs to become number one in your life, above family, above work, above everything.

That might sound crazy, putting the program above your family. But how can you be there for your family if your life is falling apart? Put your food program first, and you will be able to show up for your family consistently without fail, with a clear mind and love. You are hurting them by not putting your recovery first.

This is a bummer. Realizing how big your problem is can be life-changing. I know because I’ve been there too. The solution is to commit to your program. Wake up early and meditate. Have morning and evening habit stacks in place. Write out your food the day before. Connect with the Online Support Community via text or phone and stay dedicated to your food. Eat your weighed and measured portions. Enjoy your life.

That kind of program will keep you from thinking, “Oh, I can eat that, just this once.” Commit to a daily, structured program that keeps food addiction amnesia at bay and prevents relapse. I encourage you to join Bright Line Eating, commit fully, and build a life where abstinence and support make your recovery possible. It’s the only way I know that works.

Food Addiction Amnesia was originally published on March 20, 2024: https://www.brightlineeating.com/blog/food-addiction-amnesia